Call Target Corp, Because Are You Even Serious?!
Fun facts for those who don't know me!
Ugh. Peaceful season, forsooth.
- I am stupidly afraid of birds.
- I'm congenitally unable to spend less than $50 on a trip to Target, and most of that is washi tape (or, as Josh calls it, adhesive-free tape).
- I buy exactly two magazines per year: the December issues of Martha Stewart and Real Simple, because cookies, and also because sometimes you hit the jackpot and get an oil painting of Martha-as-snow-queen-with-frosting-fascinator, and that's a once-in-a-lifetime situation, not to be missed.
This morning I visited Target and, near the checkout, picked up my two magazines. I'm sorry to report that Real Simple has devolved into the horror show you see at right.
And I muttered to myself, this is the worst magazine cover I have ever seen.
Ha. NOPE!
In case you can't see the smaller headlines: "337,117 ILLEGALS CAUGHT INVADING AMERICA!" "CHAOS AT THE BORDER." "MEXICO'S REVENGE: TURNING LOOSE CRIMINALS TO INVADE THE U.S."
But holy cow, prominently featured at the checkout was this issue of the National Enquirer. Usually, whatever. I don't mind the occasional reminder that George Clooney is a Martian prince or that Shirley Temple correctly predicted the ending of Lost. But the Enquirer has clearly swung in a new direction: strongly partisan (which itself seems out of place next to the chewing gum) and, I think, dangerously specific in its victims. It's one thing to print obviously-untrue gossip about a celebrity, but to spread racist, fear-mongering straight-up lies about entire groups of Americans—that's another.
Here are some other recent Enquirer headlines: this isn't a one-off.
The upshot: by stocking the Enquirer, Target is profiting from anti-brown-people propaganda.
That's a more activisty statement than I've ever made, and I use every word advisedly.
A short list of the people I don't want confronted with these headlines while waiting to pay for washi tape (I MEAN TOILET PAPER): my children; my credulous grandmother; Mexican-American children; white classmates of Mexican-American children; Muslim children; ANYONE. If adults want to visit Breitbart on their own computers, so be it. But while we're giving you our money? Keep non-Martha, hateful propaganda out. of. everyone's. face.
So I got white-girl teary and felt so sad and texted a couple of friends, and then I realized that white-girl-teary does nothing, and I called Target's corporate guest-relations line.
Because hey: the Enquirer can print anything it wants to. First Amendment.
And Target can sell anything it wants to. Probably also First Amendment. (?)
But I don't have to shop at Target. And if they keep selling this nonsense, I won't.
But I don't want to leave Target because Target is my beloved clean, well-lighted place, and I don't want to throw a Lonely Little Boycott Party of One without raising my hand to say "Did you realize this is going on? It's bad and needs to stop," because maybe if I/we do that, the people listed above won't have to be bullied as "illegals" and "Mexico's criminals" while they're waiting to buy washi tape. TOILET PAPER.
You know where this is going: Let's call Target!
- You may want to call your local store first, to ask whether they stock the Enquirer. Perhaps it's a store-by-store thing. Even if your store doesn't sell it, though, some do, so...
- Call Target Corporate Guest Relations at (800) 440-0680. I chose the "guest experience" option from the menu.
- Possible script: "My name is ________, and I'm a frequent Target shopper [and Red Card holder and Cartwheel user, etc]. I noticed that Target is selling the National Enquirer, which seems to have taken a hard partisan turn and is now printing untrue, racist propaganda about groups of people in our country, like Muslims and Mexican immigrants. I do not want to be confronted with this in a store I patronize. But even more, I do not want my children or my neighbors of color to be confronted with it, or with the racist behavior of people who believe this propaganda. I would like to ask Target Corp to discontinue selling the National Enquirer in all stores until the magazine stops printing racist propaganda. I love Target and shop there weekly, but I will stop doing so [or strongly consider stopping] unless this change takes place. Please forward this complaint not only to local managers but also to corporate decision-makers." [NB: This is not the script I used, because I was a little up in my feelings at the moment and babbled. Perhaps you will be more articulate.]
This call definitely took a little longer than calls to senators, but it was extremely pleasant. The associate I spoke with said that I would never have to experience this again, which: 1) it wasn't actually traumatic (for me), and 2) I'm a little skeptical that one phone call did the trick.
But more than one phone call...? Friends! LET'S GO!
Because yes, there are a lot of problems with Target (eg, fast fashion), but I, for one, admit that I haven't given it up. But I don't have to confront my every concern about Target to speak up on this one, which is a simple, straightforward, and capitalistically unimpeachable ask.
Target does not need to be profiting from the Enquirer's fear-mongering. But you know what Target does need? The affection of teary white 36-year-old mothers with a thing for washi tape.
Let us know in the comments if you make the call, and what you hear. Oh, and this is a post to share with friends, because the more the merrier.
Updated to add: Obviously, it's not just Target that sells the Enquirer. I'm starting here, but it's worth calling other retailers, as well.
Citations: All Enquirer headlines from nationalenquirer (dot) com. Don't bother.
Two small parting gifts. One, a significantly less pernicious but INSANE headline from the Enquirer (it's the addition of JB that carries it to sublimity). The other, the aforementioned oil-painting cover from last year. You can click to expand, which I recommend, 11/10. Drink it in.
